Betsy, Meet Teddy

Christmas is coming (after all, the first day of autumn is only hours away), so I wasn't surprised to hear there's a new teddy bear on the market. But I was surprised to learn that there's more to this guy than just a winsome face. He comes with a remote control. When you push it, he farts.

For those who are wary of remote-action toys, there's a stripped-down model with a belly button which, when pushed, achieves the same bodily emission. In fact, a cursory internet search turned up no less than 30-some farting teddies.

My first reaction was disdain: why can't toy manufacturers be content to produce bears made just for cuddling? But then I remembered the doll I received for Christmas when I was about four years old. She came with her own plastic baby bottle. With Mother's permission, the bottle could be filled with water and fed to baby via a small opening in her round pink lips. And, in the blink of an eye, her diaper was wet. I still remember the wicked thrill of discovering the (anatomically incorrect) exit hole in Betsy Wetsy's bottom.

So I guess there's nothing much to scoff at, after all. Water. Gas. This, too, shall pass.